19 “Fun Facts” Students Shared That Left Their Teachers Amused, Amazed, And Hilariously Uncomfortable
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19 “Fun Facts” Students Shared That Left Their Teachers Amused, Amazed, And Hilariously Uncomfortable

Updated 4 hours ago. Posted 5 hours ago

“One of my kindergarteners shared, ‘You’ll never see my mom’s real nose! She got a new one in college!'”

We recently shared a post in which teachers shared the most memorable “fun fact” their students have shared on the first day of class, and they were hilarious, random, and seriously WTF?


BuzzFeed

Well, more teachers (and parents!) jumped into the comments section with more of the hilarious — and seriously WTF — “fun facts” students have shared, and all I have to say is “WOW.”

1.

“In my daughter’s high school health class, the teacher asked the students the icebreaker, ‘If you could be anything, what would you be?’ One boy replied, ‘A dildo.'”


NBC

—Valerie Ann Seamons, Facebook

2.

“My daughter shared, ‘My mom eats frosting right out of the can with a spoon! She does it all the time, and one time we ran out of frosting and she cried until my Dad said he’d go get more!’ She failed to mention that I was pregnant at the time.”

—Alicia Marie Hartle-More, Facebook

3.

“A guy at work shared the fun fact that for the past six months, he had eaten nothing but egg fried rice from his favorite takeout spot.”

watson96

4.

“I had a kindergartener blurt out, ‘You know, you’ll never see my mom’s real nose. She got a new one in college!'”


TvLand

—Gabby Hancock, Facebook

5.

“One of my high schoolers told the class that they were born with all of their teeth.”

“Apparently, it’s a thing, albeit rare. But I feel for any mom who looks down at a newborn baby’s toothy grin — nightmare fuel for sure.”

cperryrun

6.

“A little boy in my preschool class had an accident, and only had extra pants packed, but no underwear. Well, I knew his mom was on the way, so I told him he’d be OK in just pants for a few minutes. In response, he said, ‘Oh yeah — that’s fine, my mom never wears underwear.'”


NBC

—Beth Hendry, Facebook

7.

“My fun fact is that I was an ‘oops’ baby. All of my siblings are old enough to be my parents, and my parents are old enough to be my grandparents.”

—Eleesha Okumura, Facebook

8.

“I asked my students for a fun fact, and one of the kids said, ‘One time, I got kicked in the balls by my cow.’ When I got to the next kid, his fun fact was, ‘I saw him get kicked in the balls by his cow.'”

darasilverma

9.

“One of my middle schoolers shared, ‘I was conceived in the back of a van!'”


Warner Bros.

“Half of my sixth graders had their eyebrows up in shock, and the other half wore looks of consternation trying to figure out what conceived meant.”

bhhcrossx4

10.

“I had a sailor casually share that before he was in the service, he was a bull inseminator — which is when you help a bull ‘do its thing’ into a container so that you can artificially inseminate more cows with one dose.”

—Angela Fritz, Facebook

11.

“The fun fact I share is that I once got kicked out of a buffet for eating too much.”

—Charlotte Alexander, Facebook

12.

“My fun fact is when I was a toddler, I almost overdosed on gummy vitamins. They were so good, I thought they were candy, and I almost ate the whole jar!”


Comedy Central

“My mom rushed me to the hospital, where they said if I had eaten one more, they would have had to pump my stomach!”

leibay03

13.

“I once asked a first grader how her Thanksgiving break was, and she enthusiastically answered, ‘My dad still has diarrhea!'”

staceymmounce

14.

“My fun fact is always that one of my legs was always longer than the other until I was once knocked down by a car and broke my hip. It healed oddly and became misaligned with the other…making that leg now the exact same length as the other!”

dawnw42c9bb8ed

15.

“When I was in first grade, I told the class my stepdad stole people’s cars for a living. He worked for a company that repossessed cars when the lease went unpaid.”


Bravo

16.

“My fun fact is that Olive Garden is my only follower on Twitter!”

squish37

17.

“My fun fact was usually that I have a connective tissue disorder that makes me very flexible, and I worked as a contortionist at a haunted house from ages 4 to 17.”

“It was for a nonprofit youth group that had mostly teenagers as the actors. I got an earlier start because my parents and brother volunteered there.”

brittanyb4492c65a0

18.

“One of my sixth graders told me he only grew hair on one armpit. Then he pulled up his shirt to prove it.”

kymmacm

19.

“The classroom helper asked my niece — who’s in first grade — if she had a good summer, and she said, ‘No, but what I do have is allergies.'”


NBC

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Some responses have been edited for length and clarity.

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